Tits. Melons. Ta-tas. Boobies. Hooters. Yabos. Cones. Rockets. Guns. Scuds. Whatever you want to call 'em, doesn't matter. If I could change ONE THING about my body, that would be it. Seriously. It ain't pretty. After two babies, some serious growing (then shrinking), nursing and stretching - doesn't exactly make them nice to look at. I've never been self-conscious of the size - I'm ok with that part. It's the stretching and saggy part that I don't like anymore.Why is it they don't make bathing suite & bikinis with the kind of "lift" that a good bra has? I've never spent $100 on a bra - but I sure did on a bikini that still isn't very flattering in that area. WTF? I think I missed my calling as a swimsuit designer.
A couple weeks ago, I went to lunch with a contractor that I know through my work. We (or he) decided to go to Earls on Robson, namely because of the "eye candy" there. I went for it. I think we spent about 80% of our lunch conversation on the "are they real?" conversation regarding our server. It made me wonder: what is society's obsession with big, beautiful breasts? And why is it that we just have to know if they're real or fake? Because really, when I get mine, I don't care if people are guessing whether they're real or not. The only thing I'll care about is that they'll be wonderful, beautiful, I'll be able to wear those tank tops with the "shelf bra" (shelf? seriously?) and not have to still wear a bra underneath in hopes of keeping the girls above my belly-button, and they'll be (like in the Seinfeld episode) F-A-B-U-L-O-U-S.
However, here you can read a great story on the one's God gave me and how I love to show them off in public.
14 comments:
I forgot to mention, a big Thank-You to Adam for helping with all the synonyms. I actually left the draft open while I was working on the first paragraph, and he added the last 6 or so words.
Way to go Adam.
I agree, we place way too much emphasis on whether a chick's boobs are real or fake. Who the fuck cares? If they look hot, they look hot- however she managed to get them.
That's awesome! When I was reading your opening, I actually thought "She probably asked Adam for help with that." I knew it!!
Are you really planning to get implants? I really never knew that.
I've always wondered if the real/fake debate was maybe an excuse for guys to look even more closely and obviously at breasts. You know. Like it's okay because it's an objective, scientific stare. Not at all like eye-groping.
I would so love to purchase myself some nice perky breasts. I remember those...someday....
Yeah. Seriously? You can have mine. They are kid-free.
I've never personally handled a set of fake breasts, but I don't know as though I'd care one way or the other. Since, in general, breasts are for the woman to enjoy, if you want to have a boob job so you feel good about them, go for it. What others think about them past that are up to them. Me, personally? I'd never want my wife to get a boob job *for me*, because I'm fine with what she has. But if it'd make her feel good...well, who am I to bitch?
it's fun playing "are they real" with a guy and hearing their opinions on them :)
I always say if I ever have kids I am going to for sure get a boob job after. Not that my boobs are incredibly perky now, but I am sure they will be hanging around my waist when all is said and done so some fixin' will be absolutely necessary.
Both stories are great!
Oh what children do to us!
Its nice to have some sympathy - especially when I felt like a BOOB after reading about the ladies that opted for reductions!
I am so shallow.
I'm going for a set of fake'uns too. OMG! We should go together! ;)
Surprisingly, I got a bathing suit at WAL-MART of all places, that actually supports quite nicely sans bra (a tankini)...and I do need support! I'm afraid to ever have kids after what yo-yoing has already done to mine!
Breasts? I'm not sure what they are. After breastfeeding my two, they shrunk down to an astounding size A. So depressing. At least people will never wonder if mine are real though : )
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